Slow Couple of Motorboat Free Nights

1) Chae's Lounge
2) High Jinks
3) Crazy

So, it was a very slow couple of nights, with a fair amount of repeats, but we'll cover the new ones.

Friday we found ourselves on the prowl for a new location to mow down. We were walking the streets and strolled past Chae's Lounge. Inside were about 15 dudes singing a parody of "I Wanna Be Sedated". Their words were "We just masturbated" and they had the obligatory up and down or "jacking it" hand gestures to go along with it. What a bunch of frigging queers. We were tempted to avoid it all together, but when we cycled back through it was empty. So we knocked it off of the list while the homo patrons were gone.

We went out of the main strip to hit High Jinks next. It was very expensive. 2 thousand more per drink than other places run. Pretty crappy music, very few people, off of the main path and expensive drinks means we won't be going back anytime soon.

Saturday found us in 1 more new bar. We had been promised that boobies and motorboat contests were held in Crazy...alas it was an old mammasan and a dumpy little waitress..and us. The bathroom was very difficult to find and even hard to find the bar after you leave the bathroom. You had to go out through a small locked door. The pisser was a hole in the floor. On the way back in the door had re-locked. Since they could not hear my knocks through the glass screen door that covered the other door and was also locked...Well, I have a few nicks on my knuckles, we'll leave it at that. All I want to know is where is my motor boat?

There's A Flag On The Field...Looks Like A Party Foul On The Rookie!

1) Touchdown -- oh wait they were not open...
1a.) Triangle Bar
2) Beer Bunker
3) Club Pulse
4) Hideaway
5) Hilton Club
6) Wingz
7) Stereo
8)Power Club

Wow...where to begin? So the Don was kind enough to give a couple more rookies a try out...These 2 came to play though. We started the evening at the Touchdown Club...well we tried to anyway. Lights were on, music was playing, big screen going on, windows open...except it was like strolling into a couple of Korean's living room. They apparently weren't open and the people seemed offended that we would even try and come in.

So, We started the evening at the Triangle bar. Gay name but good bar. The drinks were big and potent. The place was huge and had a "Mafia" room in the back area that the Don was able to make use of. We had to coax the rookies at first, but they decided they were ready to come out of the bullpen and get a few innings of work in.

Off the beaten path and down the side alley we hit the Beer Bunker. It was pretty crowded. Their bathroom was halfway up/down the stairs... a little odd, but even odder that the Don liked to pee with the door open so everyone could stare at him taking a leak. JK, not to be out done layed a deuce in the same can, with the door open.

Club Pulse was next on the agenda and I'm pretty sure one of the rookies ditched us about this point. It was hard to find, but a good bar overall. Good looking waitstaff in basketball jerseys for uniforms. A great bar for shouting at people on the main strip. We watched some poor drunk bastard try several times to make it up and down the stairs across the street. Heckles gave the man a rash of crap. I am very surprised somebody didn't come up and slap her...she went at them pretty good. A lot like the Don when he's drunk with a lipper packed at a Yankee game.

Heckles was proving to be a pretty decent rookie...and then it happened...Hey, wanna roll with us? Thanks Heckles!...Thanks a heap. We also had to hide Paddington because his ole lady was out and almost saw him boozin.

The Hideaway was our next victim. A very small bar, but they had a balcony. More party fouls committed here, but on the visiting team, none of our players. A little E-CB issue that the Don was not too thrilled about.

Hilton was OK, nothing spectacular, but it's off the list. Just a regular bar.

We made it to Wingz and things get fuzzy after that. Heckles was kind enough to buy a round of shots...3 Wisemen. For the non-partay-peoples that would be a mix of Jim, Jack and Jose. Luka was on his period and couldn't drink a shot, even though it was his recommendation to buy them. I knocked his back too. We couldn't leave one on the bar after Heckles was nice enough to buy them.

We hit Stereo next. Another crappy juicy. Lame clientele. 30 year old"boys" backwards hats looking to bang juicies. Luka and I ruined their games though. We assured the juicies that nobody on base liked those 2 guys because they were "same-same". So when they come back, they will have trouble convincing people they are not gay...Turn your f&^king hat around ya mook!

We parted ways about this time and Luka and I needed a drink to relax after a long night of Pub Crawling, so we stopped at Power Club. I know, it sounds more like Paddington's kind of place. A place to work your guns and look at sweaty men, but it was a juicy bar. They were like polar bears in the Arctic. They seemed to be hungry and going to attack anything. Very aggressive! Luka punched one and screamed "Impossible is nothing!!!" and then kicked the poor girl. I probably would not have kicked the pregnant one, but hey...

Back to AA Go the Rookies

1) (Cheers)
2) Bulldog
3) The Giant
4) Roxy

So the night started a little slow but picked up speed as we went along. We started at Cheers, which I recommend avoiding unless you are just checking it off of your list as well. The beer was expensive, flat and warm. The ratio of poles to holes was infinite. Staff and the other clientele were doofs.

Next up was Bulldog. A nice bar, good music to choose from. Good prices and as close to a genuine Irish Pub you'll find here. They had a bike in a closet, just in case we needed to drive Paddington to meet his "Chicks". Paddington did manage to meet up with us there, but he showed up with two sweaty dudes...not insinuating anything, but...he showed up with 2 sweaty dudes.

Next we hit the Giant. Quiet place with a friendly staff. Obligatory Russian hooker included. We were traveling light at that point and called up a couple of rookies from the farm team. Our bartender was very friendly and offered to teach us some Korean. One of the rookies asked how he could tell a man they were handsome...again, not insinuating.....Good place, but we had to put a nipple on the rookies' drinks.

Roxy was the last of the new bars before we hit a repeat. One of the rookies had never been to a juicy joint, and boy did we ever show them one. Tons of non-aggressive juicies in their natural habitat. The Don and I downed our beers and were ready to go. The Rooks however had drank a sip or 2, but left when we were ready.

We hit a repeat of Playboys to show the rookies the magic of slushies. The Don decided we should get 2 pitchers since there was 4 of us...Let's just say that 2 of the 4 glasses were filled repeatedly, and 2 did not get half way finished. Good try for the rookies, but they might need a couple of more starts with AA Albuquerque Isotopes. Nice effort and worth at least the at-a-boy or good game.

And Then There Was 51!

1) The Russian Bar

2) Gold Star

3) Time Out

4) First and Last

So the man that asked to go by G-Money, but shall be known as The Hood Rat, started us off on our path. He has been out with us a couple of times and knows the game. We went by the Russian Bar on the 3rd floor. Shittiest joint that I have ever been in to. We left before the shots that I ordered were payed for.

That was OK because we knocked off the Time Out next. Hood Rat and JK snuck in all undercover style and let them know we were there to represent!

We had a repeat on Playboy next. One of the FNG (Burt), had never had soju and Luka had never had a slushie, so we killed 2 birds. As we were leaving Playboy, the Hottie inquired as to the Crawl's future plans. Elliot made sure she had a card, because he is Milli Vanilli smooth like that. We tried to follow them to the Griffin, but there wasn't enough Homo Juice to get us that far.

We ended at First and Last. Good name if you have a bunch of confused drunks rolling through, but a pretty crappy bar. Chickletts ditched us at this point...Home Boy better be an astronaut and downing some Tang! That's the only "free pass".

Next Thursday we cross the bridge people! Be on the lookout for when and where.

It's Time To Pay Tribute People!

It's time to pay tribute to a fine American. Blessed is the douche bag that gets by for 45 years on his brother's name...It's time to let your inner Irish out and pay tribute to Ted "Chappaquiddick" Kennedy. Something green is all we ask. Friday, a little after 8 at JJ's. Wear the green (preferably a shirt) and show the ROK that you will miss "Liquid" Ted as much as the rest of us...Booze it up! I think that since he has been tagging along, it's Crocket's turn to buy...he's finally off call and ready to roll! Chappaquiddick! Chappaquiddick! Rest in peace you murdering booze hound...Rest in peace!

It's A Blitzkrieg!!!!

1) The Loft
2) The Blue Jazz
3) The Dawg Pound

First do the math...2009 minus 1986 =23.

So we swooped in like the German Luftwaffe, silent and unexpected...There we were, on a Thursday. We Knocked out 3 of them too. Like London in the 40's...boom...boom...down they went.

We Started at the Loft. Quiet and easy. There was a little kitty in there though. It was cute and the only pussy we've had in months. Nice bar with a view. 2K Won for a draft...God bless happy hour!

On to the Blue Jazz next. Smooth easy music. Not much beer to choose from though. Great view and nice bartender.

Finished the raid at the Dawg Pound. Not very big, but quiet and decent. Good music playing in the background.

Exclusive: Video of Juicy Killer From Last Weekend!

Dude, the goal is to pee in every BAR!

Slow But Busy Night

1) The Blood Club
2) The People

So, we've never gotten as bad as home boy on the bench.

We started at Blood Club. Very much a Juicy bar. There were a couple of real losers in there. One dude paying one of the girls a large sum of money for some reason...hmmm...why would a goofy looking drunk give a pretty girl a pile of cash? Another loser with one hand up a Juicy's shirt and his other hand up her skirt. Real winners of guys. Are people really that desperate?

We rolled to the People next. Good view, decent music. The drinks were tiny. Just a bit bigger than a shot glass, and VERY weak. We needed to ask to make sure that she actually put rum in with the coke. Pretty slow night. FNG and I had to resolve a personal issue with the local authorities. The Don ran away...he don't do well with the cops. Decent night over all.